I have been awful. I have neglected the blog terribly for two nights in a row. Today, I intend to catch up and write three posts to make it up to you.
I have one reason that is sufficient and one that is not. On Thursday night my Grandad called for a chat. He is extremely lonely as my Nanny passed away a couple of months ago. He has been away in Germany visiting his family since then but has just come back to their house to face everything. I hate that he lives so far away, 524 miles is too far. I hate that none of our family live down near him. My heart breaks as he explains how lonely he is and how he misses my Nan. I hate that she’s gone. As I listened to his stories of Germany and his heartache I silently grieved all over again, until we said our goodbyes , until I didn’t have to put on a brave voice anymore, until I didn’t have to be strong for the man that was always the strongest man in my life. He got so excited when I mentioned we would be looking in trips soon. So now I have an irruption urge to plan my holiday days for the rest of the year.
My LSH is stressed at the moment, he has so many things resting on his shoulders and there are not enough hours in the day to complete his work, spend time with me, sleeping, carry out his Open University studying, relaxing and working out. I can feel the stress emanating from him and there are only a few things I can do to help. The one thing he needs me to help with is granting magical powers to increase the number of hours in a day.
So as you can see, my desire to coordinate the hell out of my holidays clashes with the frame of mind my LSH is in. Therefore, I am bottling it until he can handle my intense need to sort out days dedicated to being lazy for the both of us.